What is on my mind

Bulk packing tape and boxes... that is all I am thinking about.  Well except for buying a good Purdy paint brush and color samples for paint and the wallpaper that I bought for Christmas for my bedroom and where in the heck the drapery rod holders went on our last move and the fact that we have moved from a house in Utah to a hotel to a house in Stafford to a house in NW Hillsboro, to a house on Chehalem Mountain and now into Sherwood proper....all in 2 and a half years.  This has been one wild roller coaster ride.  I really have to sit back and laugh a little.  March of 2007 sent me to my knees, asking why we needed to move and if it was right.  We just woke up one day and made a life changing decision.  I have always followed the craziest of impressions from the spirit.  They have never led me down the wrong path.  Until now, I thought.  Honestly, I don't understand the past 2 1/2 years of trial and turmoil.  It hasn't been an easy road.  I can't look back at it yet and say it was worth it.  I'm still in it.  Maybe in a year or two, I will see the point of it all.  But part of me is so glad that my spiritual promptings were right on the money.  When things stop working and life becomes a series of unfortunate events, you start to question God's directions.  You can't see his big picture.  And somehow it just doesn't make any sense to you at all.  Really, this big convoluted circle that we have gone through these past 2 1/2 years has brought us back to the same town, buying a house and raising our children here.  No matter how many times I asked God if this was the right path, He just kept saying yes.  Even though it was rocky and thorny and dark.  We just kept walking, sometimes crawling, down this dark and dreary way, hoping for any sign of light at the end...  I can see the light now.  Haven't completely stepped into it, but I know it's just around the bend, and I couldn't be more thrilled.  We survived it.  I can't believe it sometimes.  There were so many times when I just wanted to give up...but I didn't.  Giving up wouldn't solve anything.  I'd still be stuck in the dark if I didn't get back up and keep moving forward.  I look back at some of the experiences that we have been called to pass through and I wonder what exactly they were supposed to teach me...maybe I will never know, but some of them were life changing.  I will never be the same person I was back then.  I've learn so much and gained so much ground.  I really hate being refined.  It sucks getting heated to the bending point and that hammer is just so dang biting.  But hopefully, we will have a season of rest for a while.  I'm banking on some normal for a while.  It' looks so inviting from here!