Motivation

I bought this shirt at Goodwill last night.  Patrick and I love to go Junking.  And I picked up this cute fitted shirt that will inspire me to lose another 10 lbs.  It looks ok on me right now, but it's a tad tight in some areas, so I will hang it up in the closet and think about singing this whole album on a road trip to California in the summer.  My dad would be so proud of me!

Just FYI

So I have a osteoma on my fibula and I think it might be related to the leg pain I have had for the past 6 years...
I actually found a doctor that takes my insurance and heaven be blessed, she employs a Naturopath!  I get to have a Naturopath be my primary care provider and my insurance still covers it!!!  Yet another reason to love this town of mine! No excuse to not go to the doctor anymore eh?

Something I was just shaking my head at, one doctor said MS six years ago and then I had an MRI of my brain.  The neurologist said it's because I am fat.  So I said screw you and moved on.  Chiropractor and some other weird stuff and nothing has helped.  Not one  wanted to take a look at my hip, thigh, or calf...until I fell down the stairs.  Funny, I just thought it was something related to giving birth to 5 kids so close together...

Come hell or high-water, I will get pics of my leg....I want to get this taken care of yesterday.

Food

Since September, I have rarely cooked completely homemade. Mom went on a strike. After cooking and cleaning everyday for what seemed like a year, I'd had it. Everyone gets the benefits of my hard work, but no one was willing to help. We used to eat lots of veggies and had 3 squares a day. Now, the kids are lucky if I open a can of Chili or make something besides breakfast for dinner. It's not that I don't love cooking, but I've fallen out of the habit of being engrossed by what I eat. And I am a food snob. Card carrying, book reading, sustainable loving, free ranging, grass fed, food snob. So eating that bag of Lays Potato Chips just doesn't do it for me like it used to. Triscuits are good, but homemade crackers rock. I can't stand pregrated Parmesan or Campbell's soup. You'll never catch me making a casserole with cream of mushroom soup. In fact, I do not have a can of Campbell's in my pantry anywhere. Food is super important to me. I must make it more important to me again. Maybe it's because I am sick or maybe it's because I've gained 15 lbs by eating this way, but I want to stop. Because when you know better, you have to do better. I'm not ignorant to evils of processed foods. But it's hard. It's hard to grind your own organic wheat for bread. It's hard to raise your own chickens, grow your own organic produce, cook convenience foods from scratch. My children are literally eating me out of house and home and it's all junk. I'm sick with a sore throat today, and have plenty of time to research CSA's in my area. So if I can have a farm I go to once a week and get 20lbs of veggies along with eggs and grass fed beef and pastured chickens, why shouldn't I? I'll tell you. Because that means lots of work for mom. It means being in the kitchen alot. If I bite off this, then I have to stick to it. In the long run, it will probably be less expensive than going to WinCo, but in the short run, it will take so much of my time. Am I willing to do that for my family? What are the fringe benefits to living this lifestyle? Longevity, wellness, teaching things that I can pass on to my children? Is it worth it? Is sacrifice worth the reward? Is it worth it to me to give my children the healthiest meals available and feel good when I get up in the morning. I have got to say, that I have been exhausted lately. Ever seen Super Size Me? It's true. I'm a living testimonial that junk makes you feel like crap. We didn't eat fast food for almost a year. I made everything from scratch. Now I am paying the price by having extra weight and no energy. So I ask again...is it worth the sacrifice? And the answer is a most resounding YES! I CAN DO HARD THINGS!!! I know that most of you have no idea what I am talking about, but I need to do this. It sucks sometimes, to sacrifice, but in the end, the reward at the end of the day is worth it.
Check this out if your interested